Now that you are 24!

(A letter to a college friend when they turned 24 years of age)

 On days like this, sometimes I wonder how we got here. From being stupid, and scrawny freshmen kids suffering from "skinisis" to now respected men with dreams and integrity. Men with a future, and men with a passion. I remember all the crazy stuff we did in college. Well, it’s more like all the crazy stuff I did in college.  But you were always a calm soul. The reasoning voice behind temper and anger, MR COOL. And of course the tallest. Yes, you are still the tall-ass-freak. Now the world flipped a coin on us, money and fame is taking us to different places.

 Do you remember you ex-roommate? He is chasing his passion, dancing night and day. The smell of success is in the air, but entertainment is a tough business. I think he needs to insure his legs now, "ha-ha", you have to love Americans! And that friend of yours from Jamaica – the one with a twin? I heard he is interviewing trying to connect the dots. I can see a line forming from the dots. A bold black line!  I'm on Wall Street, learning the rules again, and fighting for survival. It’s a jungle thicker than the African jungle, but I'm a lion bigger than any African cat.

 And then there is you, going to school again, indeed there is no ending to learning. At least we will have one friend who can boast on dinner tables that he has a ‘masters’ in NOTHING.  I mean it, continued education is a sorry game in which only academic institutions win. But so many of our close friends are stuck in the trenches trying to fit the pieces of the puzzle together. It seems like somebody stole the pieces they are looking for and threw them deep under the Nile. Where is that “J” in the “J.O.B”? James keep shouting while looking for a job.  At some point we all shout in agony of unemployment. So much for the American dream. It is just about your dream and nothing else matters.  But with a precious few, we should stay in contact, bounded by our laughter, sorrows, and the crazy drunk nights in the college dorms and the stressful senior thesis. 

 As I was reflecting on your birthday, I realized that growing up is nothing more than making more decisions about your life and living with the consequences. That's it! Literally it’s all about making decisions.  Think about it. When you were young, someone stayed with you, figured out what to wear for you, fed you and took you to school. When you got into high school things changed, you had to make some decisions about yourself. In college, we thought we were grown up, but still somebody made decisions for us: what food was going to be in the cafeteria and so forth. But now that you are 24, you have to make more and even harder decisions for yourself. Now you have to pay rent for your apartment, know how to invest your money for the future, understand who to be romantically involved, and which politicians to support (better not support any). So, growing up is nothing more than making more decisions about your life and living with the consequences. It is that simple, plain and basic. Even a physical education major can figure it out.

 Now, remember how much influence you have on your life. Every decision you make will bring fond memories or haunt you in the future. Be aware and take heed. Take your time to make a decision but do not linger for long, it’s a weakness. Make firm and prompt decisions, but do not rash, it’s also a weakness. Now is the time to choose your destination. Now is the time to decide. The world has waited long enough for your break through, whether it’s your first million or whatever tickles you. Now is the time to be 24. Stay true to yourself and the building blocks of your life-family. Remember our Alma Mater and be kind to her. Become a global citizen and treat everyone equally. And I mean fucking everyone (race, gender, sex, religion) but never forget who you. Love a woman and read books. Teach and be taught. Stealth is always better than confrontation. Be passive when provoked, literally, the Jesus kind of passiveness of giving another cheek. Eat, drink and have plenty of sex and always remember nothing is free under the sun. Give back, its cathartic. Learn the rules of life and be politically shrewd. Make plenty decisions, and may the decisions you make from now be a source of pride and joy for all of us. And always keep on growing, because life is all about progress.

 Now that you are 24!